Untitled

Its a strange feeling. 

I am finding it hard to describe where I am today. I don't wanna sound depressing, because I am not :) Its a confusing cloud. Floating up above me. 

People around are calling me a lunatic. It is unsettling at night :D 

I remain a residue hiding at the bottom of the ocean. Quarterlife crisis as mentioned in one article. OK. A fresh year coming up and as again its time for resolutions. It never fructifies but yeah costs nothing to write down. 

Being fit and agile is my topmost priority. I have to swing. I have to run. Get high just running. Just one resolution thats all :-)

Live, celebrate and have a good time.

Sideways

From a choir. And then from a chair. The roots and how they were shining. The stones. With what we are made. I had a distant dream of setting my soul to sing and dance. The curious shine and the roots. So pure and so calm.

How unusual it is for me to be in Love. I opened the doors. All the years got jammed and it did open. Made a strange sound. The one I never heard. The one I always longed to hear. The one I only dreamt about.

A crystal of Splendor. I am tired again :)

______________________________________________________________

What is it about Wine? Maya in 'Sideways' says

"I like to think about the life of wine. How it's a living thing. I like to think about what was going on the year the grapes were growing; how the sun was shining; if it rained. I like to think about all the people who tended and picked the grapes. And if it's an old wine, how many of them must be dead by now. I like how wine continues to evolve, like if I opened a bottle of wine today it would taste different than if I'd opened it on any other day, because a bottle of wine is actually alive. And it's constantly evolving and gaining complexity. That is, until it peaks, like your '61. And then it begins its steady, inevitable decline. And it tastes so fucking good"


On the same lines..


"It was true that I didn't have much ambition, but there ought to be a place for people without ambition, I mean a better place than the one usually reserved. How in the hell could a man enjoy being awakened at 6:30 a.m. by an alarm clock, leap out of bed, dress, force-feed, shit, piss, brush teeth and hair, and fight traffic to get to a place where essentially you made lots of money for somebody else and were asked to be grateful for the opportunity to do so?" -- Charles Bukowski

Mylo Xyloto

Here it is again. From one of the most talented groups - Coldplay. I must admit that this release is less explosive than VivaLaVida, but nevertheless its the "Iceberg" voice (as my friend Suraj opines) that I am after. This makes it very cool. 

"Through chaos as it swirls
It's us against the world"

We need a picture. Some random gestures. From a mile away, I need someone waving at me. We need an Image makeover. The option to believe that things will get simple. There is no congestion. In about a month, I will be 26. Officially declared as an Uncle! No regrets as of now. I have what I love the most. Maybe, as the days pass by things may get crooked. But "we gotta do what we gotta do" ;-)

At peace..

The Balance

Too much of everything is bad. I need fresh air. Too much of stress on my mind is creating problems. I definitely need "THE BALANCE".

Starting today, I will say NO to my menial desires. This state sucks. Never be on the border line. Why make it confusing and complicated. Lets just say "Every problem has a solution"

To any dumb asshole who comes up to me and says "Well, not all problems have solutions" - Fuck off. In all my practical existense, there never was a problem which didn't have a solution. Its very simple. 

Music and broken notes

The urge to explore has never gone down. Soul music is what I am after. It is not a genre, but music that keeps you sane.

Seven Mary Three - Cumbersome, Rodrego
Pearl Jam - Release, Garden

Eddie Vedder is the best. I must have said this like a zillion times. He is now above everything in music for me. He completes everything. And I for sure will always follow his tunes and his voice. So much is written but none of it has been published. I thought now would be a good time to post whatever has been left incomplete. I have no clue how they came out. I must admit, I have written these lines when I was tired, frustrated, angry and idle. Fuck it.

Daylight brushes of a calm morning
I rushed to the window to find the beauty in you
the sight which kept me in existence
for all the years that my soul travelled
washed away those split moments 


what I dreamnt, what I became
__________________________________


for want of living, life is given
can I actually live this life then?


as the dawn and dullness of yesterday
flew over my head to embrace this sad inside
my soul at that tick of time grew happy
as the dusk and fullness of tomorrow
erased everything I carried


why then my soul disturbs me at night
when only the tides get stronger
and the rest get to pleasure deep slumber
I sit up and fight with my own might


all time the sun is down
my thoughts just get deeper and deeper
accompanied by the lady of mist with her sharp frown
_________________________________


Like stars on earth
Like music on earth
Like the last shadow of sadness
Like the mix of bliss from yesterday
Like my own self

_________________________________

let all birds flap their wings

when you open your eyes

let the clouds give way to the moon

when you lift your gaze to the skies

let the wind sweep your tears

when a white horse passes by you

let the ground be decorated with ice crystals

when your foot leaves a print of the past

and when I come, along the silent street

shall we walk, holding hands

and getting dissolved in a different world

till our memory slowly fades away into nature's own hand

when the wind stops and the moon disappears

we will part only to be united again by Nature's blessings

_______________________________

drive me to the immortal sea

where light from sun and sound from within make a common plea

as i rest my heart upon yours

may the sea be turned into a garden of flowers

lay by me, be my song

be my ecstasy, my color, my book

your breath locks mine

and we spiral down into an abyss of unknown dreams

________________________________

Happy new year 2011

Long time. Pretending to be busy is so fucking mean. The truth is I am not. And yet I get sucked up into this pathetic situation called 'Busy'. Horse shit. Who the fuck am I to be busy. What does it mean anyway. Lies and Lies and just lies. Vow, I feel better now :)

Richard in 'The Beach' says  "The only downer is, everyone's got the same idea. We all travel thousands of miles just to watch TV and check in to somewhere with all the comforts of home, and you gotta ask yourself, what is the point of that?"

Its true, what is really the point? Cant we allow ourselves to experience the primitive modes of life. It is now more of "Likes","Pokes" and "Breakfast updates".

When I go up the counter and buy cigarettes, the lady asks "How old are you"?

I am now into the G-Chord and still the same strumming pattern. Move forward!

One of the cleaners resigned. She got pissed off. I am now pushing hard to keep the house clean and the walls "Blue". Fuck I cant even roll out Zeppelin poster.

What is struggle? For an ordinary office goer, even a bus ride from Secunderabad to Begumpet is a struggle. He will not admit this. Such is our endurance. 

I always say something stupid. People get hurt sometimes. Shouldn't I be more careful? Improve man. Don't be a sucker. You got only one life and that's the truth. 

Why do people talk about politics anyway? No vote, no talk. Please.

"For mine is a generation that circles the globe and searches for something we haven't tried before. So never refuse an invitation, never resist the unfamiliar, never fail to be polite and never outstay the welcome. Just keep your mind open and suck in the experience. And if it hurts, you know what? It's probably worth it." -- The Beach.